I’m a Melbourne girl, so I have to start with the weather – it is super windy, rainy, and cold, and feels like winter has seriously landed! The solstice seems to have acted as a starting gun, not the midpoint of the cooler months. I’m hunkering down, grateful to have a fridge and pantry that can see me through many days too nasty to venture out into.
Now, to more interesting things (I hope).
I’ve been pondering something since I’ve started this blog, and though I don’t have a neat 3 step plan or solution worked out, I thought I’d write about it, and see what you think too. Here it is in a nutshell:
When people write blogs, or books, or magazines, or do interviews on TV; whenever people hit ‘Publish’, it puts a snapshot of who they are out into the world.
As a baby blogger, my snapshot is still in the dark room, developing and coming into focus. I can see the outline of what it can be, this blog, but it is very much still in its chemical bath, under red lights.
Since starting this blog I have been so encouraged by the amazingly community that has come from the awesome Blog With Pip groups I’m part of (next intake starts in July – sign up via the link!). Without this group of women around me, urging me on, I don’t know that I’d have any momentum, or readers! When people from outside that fabulous group read my blog and comment, it blows my mind… am I getting beyond reading my essay at the front of the classroom? Really? Amazing stuff.
I feel like somehow, virtually, and spilling over into the face-to-face world, I have stumbled upon a group people forming a really fun, cute cheer squad and doing amazing hand-clappy, robotic-arms, tumbling routines, and chanting “Go-oooo Verbs!” That is some kind of feeling. Wow.
I’ve also seen a lot of us being challenged by the ideas we hold around being ‘good enough’ and whether we have anything to add to the blogosphere (we do!), whether we’re delusional to think anyone will read our words (we’re not!), or appreciate our art, or crafty endeavours, or agree with our points of view. To all those questions, I say this, I’m hitting publish anyway! I hope you are too.
There are challenges a plenty, from coming up with something interesting to write about on a regular basis (or irregularly, there’s no ‘rule’), to the ways we engage on social media, how much of our lives we share, what we choose to share, how we deal with negative feedback, or no feedback (that’s the worst, so if you read a blog and enjoy it, please take a minute to leave a comment!).
Then there are technical challenges – coding, widgets, themes, gobbledeegook that I still don’t understand at all, but for me the main thing is to write. To sit here at my desk, type my words, read over them, give them a tidy, and then hit the publish button.
What I know for sure is that I don’t want to be a blogger that isn’t recognisable in the real world. I really, really don’t.
Here, and in my Blog With Pip community, people tell me I am encouraging and clever and lots of other lovely, blush-y things – things that I need to hear and that boost my confidence, especially in a season that’s peppered with struggle and rejection in finding paying work. I have needed this group so much. That’s why it gives me so much joy to encourage and cheer other Pipsters on. Go girls!
And I am those things, I love to encourage people, it is kind of my life’s mission I reckon, and I love that I can think creatively, and write, and engage with people online and make people laugh and ponder stuff. I love those aspects of my who and do.
BUT they are not the whole picture. They are the snapshot.
I can be cranky, judgey, too quick to speak (and definitely to quick to comment online), rude, impatient and well, frankly, unforgiving. I have issues! We all do. Some of us keep very short records, which is admirable, and some of us lug around our emotional baggage in tattered archive boxes or faded suitcases.
I want this place, where I give you the verbs (god I love my blog’s name), to be somewhere you can come for a laugh, to read something I’m thinking about and maybe think about it after you’ve read it, to see what I’m baking, to hear about my obsession with my #favouritehuman (my niece), and most of all, to have a chat about whatever is going on in your world.
What I don’t want is to build on online persona that is some kind of facade I have to remember to keep up. I’m not saying this as a way to duck my head, peep out from a Lady Di fringe and seek compliments, truly I’m not – I am saying that I am encouraging, and clever, and quick witted, and I can be a cranky pants and a person who has uttered mean words I wish I could take back. I am a single gal, a daughter, a sister and a friend – someone who has had ups and downs in life. I am all of the things. I am working actively on some of the less appealing qualities I have in my archive box, and some of them are marked ‘DO NOT DISTURB”.
So, whether you are an L-plates, still in development blogger like me, feeling your way, or an experienced and got-it-going-on blogger reading this (eep!), heck, basically, if you are a person in this world; juggling home life, work life, friendships, family dynamics, illness, relationships, finances, the highs and lows, I want you to know that you are welcome here, in whatever state you find yourself.
Drop in, leave a comment, hit me up on Facebook or Instagram and say hi, I’m having the best day ever, or just coasting, or I’m having an absolutely shit day. We’re in this together.
This is not my place, this is OUR place.
If it’s just me tap, tap, tapping and nothing else, the publish button becomes kinda redundant.
What’s on your mind today? Who do you want to be? What’s in your archive box? How’s the weather?
Let’s chat.
Annette xx
I Give You The Verbs 
I love the thought processes in this post Annette. It’s so important to show up as the person you are IRL in your online life. The two worlds very easily collide (and I love that they do) that it would be impossible to keep up any facade. It doesn’t mean you have to reveal EVERYTHING about yourself but it does mean that what you do reveal should be real.
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Definitely Nikki, I’m not planning to write “Worst Day Ever, How I Suck” posts on a regular basis, but I’ll inevitably be having them and I’m sure they’ll bleed into what I do online.
Thank you so much for taking a moment to join the conversation Nikki. Send us some sunshine please!
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Annette, I love this so much. Such a good reminder on so many levels – to remember it takes time to build a blog, to remember to actually live our lives in the real world, to remember that it is OKAY to be, well, human, in all of our wonderfully flawed glory. I love your blog, that you are the encourager, and a friend. Thanks for sharing xx
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‘Our wonderfully flawed glory’. So apt. We are flawed, and we are fabulous – and I think you and I are learning that more and more as we go along, right Sarah? Thanks x
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I loved reading this. Do you know what? We are ALL walking contradictions. We are ALL often BOTH sides of the coin. I think we don’t talk about it, but we CAN be KIND and SNARKY. We can be BRAVE and TERRIFIED. We can be ENCOURAGING and CRITICAL. It’s confusing, no?
I think this post rings very true for MANY people and I think we all struggle with the MANY sides of ourselves. WE have our best self, our perceived selves, our snarky selves, our sad selves… And with the internet there’s the concept of ‘the possible self’ : http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/01/how-to-spot-a-narcissist-online/283099/ :
It’s fascinating stuff. Excellent post and great food for thought!!
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We are all walking contradictions Pip, totally. I think I feel like some people find that super challenging. I don’t find it that way, much, except if I ‘m having a really shit day, but it is definitely something I want to be out & proud about. I am ace and I am a bugger. Thank you so much for the comment.
I’m going to check out that link this afternoon.
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I DO love the name of your blog, too and enjoy your writing style. You are the kind of friend you would take clothes shopping because you know you will get the truth – not “you look good in that” if you really don’t. It’s the best kind of friend because when you do give a compliment you know it’s for REAL! This blogging process has been a challenge but I’m finding new reasons to love it everyday!
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Jeanette, thank you! I am loving the adventure of blogging. It isn’t a competitive sport, it’s a meditation, therapy and bloody great fun most of the time. Keep at it!
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I adore your honesty Annette, and your loving way of delivering it. I admit, sometimes when I find myself being such a little ball of nastiness in the “real world”, which I honestly say I am sometimes, I think “You are such a Charlatan, yeah, you don’t write posts about THIS do you?”. When I read lovely blogs with designer all white pictures with lovely, angelic children and their mothers in linen pants, pale pink tutus, handcrafted softies and organic biscuits (which is lovely, don’t get me wrong). . . .But I feel like crawling in the corner with my inferior slippers on and a whole block of cheese. Thank you for bringing gentle honesty to the Internets today x
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Ah yes, those pastel, linen-y soft focus places, they are beautiful to look at, briefly, but not at all my style. I like my real, complex world, except when I’m chucking a fit about how things aren’t going my way. We have to be ourselves. My Big W slippers and I are now longing for a block of cheese to munch. Love your take on things Candice xx
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annette..it really is a crazy world. How weird it is to think that you could be that person sitting on the same bus as me, or in a train carriage..or in a shop line…and never notice each other. Sometimes i look around me and think…HOLY HECK..ALL these people have a story to tell. ALL of them..are people like me….all of them, complex, interesting multifaceted personalities…some i would like, some definitely not. Is this not excellent..that to me and the others who know you now…you are a person, a connection, a being we get to know….So glad we have. i have to admit,,,,,as said before…you seem mighty to me….and full of bravado and beans. I am considered quite out there and friendly….bold and brassy…but I am that…as well as shy and scared, vulnerable and unsure. Chutzpah with a large dash of insecurity.I guess that is what makes us interesting. So glad to know you Annette xxx
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When I’m not a snivelling mess, I can be mighty. Cut down the pedestals I say! Whoever is on them will topple off eventually and show their humanity.
Thanks Shani xx
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Yes Annette. After reading this I feel like Sybil. So many sides to our person (ality). It’s a juggling and balancing act in what and how we put it ourselves out there. But authenticity is the key! Definitely food for thought and a great read as always x
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I want to get some of those sides a bit closer together – I would totally HATE to be Saint Annette of the Internets – not that I’m hallucinating that particular occurrence ever happening! : )
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Ah, Annette! Love every post you do, every mood you bring, every light your dark room catches. Your snapshots are well worth the time and conversation. Thank you.
>What’s on your mind today?Who do you want to be?What’s in your archive box?How’s the weather?<
chilly, with no chance of meatballs.
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Love meatballs! Thanks Rach I kinda like the development metaphor. I’m learning, I’m happy to do that for a while.
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Well written Annette, Its true we are always ‘balancing’ the two sides to our natures and trying to sift through life showing I think our best side as often as possible, though sometimes naturally our cranky pants side rears up to show its discontent….. sometimes unexpectedly when we ‘think’ we have ourselves firmly reined in!! And it catches us out….revealing of course the impossibility to be perfect all the time for anyone, least of all ourselves.
We are all huge contradictions aren’t we, but thats what also makes us interesting and diverse I guess. Love your honesty and your humour within that too in this piece.
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Perfect all the time? Ha!! A totally bonkers goal. I’m happy to show both sides here, I hope others are happy to see that! ❤️
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The weather is glorious here on the coast in central Qld where I eagerly await the birth of my first Grandchild. There is joy at the miracle and wonder of a new life, and a hope too that this baby will give me strength to continue the struggle with the life that is already mine. Me, I try and keep the lid on my archival history box firmly shut! But we need you, Annette, to keep writing and when the the time is right, to write your ‘story’ in book form. Wishing you warmth and sunshine, a brimming larder and full employment. xx
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Tanya, your words of kindness are so beautiful, and timely. I wish for those things too.
All the best for your grandchild. Such a gift.
Thank you for saying My words are needed. I love sharing them. Full heart!
I’m jealous of your weather too!
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Annette, you are a breath of fresh, honest and authentic and brave. Clever too. I admire your style and it is great to see how well you accept yourself, and others too, warts an’ all!
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fresh air:)
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Jenny, I figure that if I don’t accept myself, it makes it hard for others to do it. It has been a deliberate act, one I’m proud of, and not finished with. I love having a place to put my thoughts out into the world, and I love even more that people are reading them, and nodding along! Thank you xx
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fresh air:)
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Annette – my lovely friend – as always you managed to articulate so eloquently what is in my heart. Yes none of us are perfect but with this fabulous little community we’ve got going in Blog with Pip land that’s OK. I love that we’ve all found each other and are here for each other. You are a gem Annette and this journey wouldn’t be the same without you. Love to you and can’t wait to meet in person in August. xx
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Deb, I feel the same way about this group. It’s like our blog ‘mothers’ group’ or being with the best people you’ve worked with, ever! I really hope we can work August out too! Thank you for your encouragement xx
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[…] From I Give You The Verbs – “Hunkering Down and Keeping it Real”: […]
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Gosh, I don’t think I’d have the energy, stamina or memory to be anyone but me! Isn’t it great that we use our blogs as a place of conversation. Sometimes that conversation is deep and serious, other times light and fluffy…but 100% us. And other people dig that – isn’t that just a thrill?! I love what you write, Annette. I truly do.
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So true Sonia, just being me is what I want! I’m pretty good at it, after all these years of practice. Still working on things, always will be. I agree, blogs are awesome and I am so thrilled that you’d say that you like it. That makes my DAY Sonia. Thanks xx
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Sonia, thank you! I love being me, even when I act like a shit, which I did today, I can regroup and hope to learn from it. It makes me so happy that I have this blog and that people are enjoying it. Hooray for blogging, and for your encouragement. Mwah!
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